Profile goes here.(not too long and not too short,maybe this much: hello i am a banana! Call me nana,or bana.I am yellow and cute. i love to peel myself cuz' after peeling myself i feel so refreshed :B I go well just like that,or you might want to dip me in chocolate. Sadly everytime i get plucked off i get separated from my friends ): Oh yes! I go best with Ice cream sundae.) About this much.

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at the shop just now, when my mom and i were entering the shop, there was this emo guy there. he came in at the same time. and guess who came in my mind? well, he is always in my mind, but this is more. i could imagine HIM as the emo guy. its like HIM. the more i stared at the emo guy, the more it hurts. cuz, i remember im not with HIM anymore. kahit nahihirapan ako, im still gna follow what u want. im not gna talk to HIM, as dont want me to. but if you are HAPPY, then im HAPPY for you, even if inside im dying. im not happy. im not inlove with someone else. I LOVE CARLO only. CLEAR?? im sticking to ONE! everyone knows ryt? something came up to me, as mark castro was talking to me he said "how if he loves someone else?" ouch, sakit nun, SANA hindi naman, kc mahal ko pa xa. i talked to HIS uncle? wahaha. 20yrs old. hmmx, like cuzzin. he is okay. im glad i talked to him as i told him some of my problems. hmmx, HE wants to forget me that much. then let it be. im just gna say I LOVE YOU to HIM everyday, if he lets me. today is a CRAZY day. i killed myself, well..i TRIED. this morning, the 1st thing on my mind was my handphone. and THAT msg. i could see it clearly as my phone has no light(my life has no light too). went to the toilet to check it. and there. everything changed. even if i want to sleep again, as it was pretty early i couldnt. those things HE said, most of the content of it, it is all WRONG! not true.

Weee, tnx, tnx, lam ko nMn mhal mko eh.. As a frend.. WeEe.. Ui.. blita ko mron kna mahal yikes.. sana cia na yan.. Msya na ako pra syo.. Naks.. Db kung sn ka msya! msya na rin ako.. ^_^ hmmm.. Like i said pg mron kna mhal titigil na ako.. Ehehe.. O yan.. WeEeEe.. Cge salamt ha.. Lgi ka magiingat ha! O yung gamot mo nainom mo na kya nyan? Naku..Kw ha..!! lgi ko cnasabi syo yan bka mklimutan mo pa! Grrr.. Ehehe.. ui..sna makipag cooperate ka nMn saken ha.. Ayaw ko na kc nasa2ktan ka eh..ehehe Gs2 mo b un.. ehehe.. wg ka muna txt or call! or comment sa friendstr ha.. ehehe.. Cge ka pg ginawa mo un mga2lit ako syo, ahaha.. gs2 ko muna kcing maklimot eh..ehehe.. Naku..ska wag ka magalala sken..OK NA OK lng aq.. Yikes! Ehehe.. Ska di ko muna pla ga2mitin cell ko ahaha.. La na kc ako ktxt ehehe.. Toink! ^_^ cge ha.. ingat ka lagi!! Ha! wg kna reply syang lng load mo, ska di ko nrin mba2sa, ehehe.. Luv u rin frend!

thats HIS sms. loong ryt? well, it took me quite long to accept it. as in understand it. i bathed straight away. went to school, i was very early, i dont mind. i waited at the bustop. and i saw nigel, he smiled at me, and i couldnt smile back, i just waved. hurr. i went to the school's hut, i saw syed and then melissa came. and guess what? i didnt talk to her. we had flagraising and someone asked me, "maria, why are u so emo?" (i forgot who!) then syed asked me too, i said id tell him later. i didnt talk to melissa at all. obviously she know what has happened. flag raising was boring. its as usual, im just so damn upset & hurt. then it was lit. i have no comment on that. so skip it. i faught with melissa. its a cat-dog fight. i used the paper and beat her. until the paper was so crumpled! huursh. its her fault anyway. if she didnt show me it wouldnt be like this. we went crazy, so i drew on my hand, with green pen. hurr. wrong colour! i tried to cut my wrist. so i used red pen and thought of red marker and wet it. i saw blood osing out. i did the same thing again and again. until the redness wont fade off. i dont care. if they think im crazy, im crazy. i love him too much, that when he left me, my world turned into a quiet place. a lonely place, no more noise. no more happy moments. the days that i was with you, i guess u didnt know how happy i was. even if we are not officially together. im happy that there is someone that is there for me to share my problems to and i know he is near, that whenever i feel like running he'd be there waiting for me. but now, id run and no one would even know where im going to. i guess ill just keep on running. running away from every problem i face. anyway, recess was not so cool, me and melissa walked around with our hands bleeding. its like blood, but not. many saw and they said "so emo" and when they say that IT starts all over again. so we decided to go back to class and nigel was there and i showed my hand, i guess he didnt notice! haha. me and mel, TRIED to wash away {the pain}. it didnt happen. so went thru it the whole day. it was maths, and it was LOVED, guess why? the jokers sat infront of us. WE joked. hmmx. got scolded by Ms.kuh? weehs. i dont know how to spell her name. mothertounge was LOVED again by me! slept? hisyam came too, {i dont know} listened to music, and it was LOVED again. with my short hair, i can listen to my mp3 anytime without being noticed, but i have to put my head down so the wire wont be exposed. by that time my mood was fine. assembly was HATED. its awfully borring! well, it was never not. after school was SWEET. me, mel & syed were planning to buy at pasarmalam. and im supposed to buy bag. hmmx. but TOO BAD. no more! they clossed it. *sobs* we ate at KFC. and we were COOL. kinda happy? that im away from home. and my phone, i killed it for a while. no point, no sms, no calls, no HIM. and then we faught again. me and melissa. its about the same damn thing. my LOVE LIFE, my sickening love life. then - passed by, omfg. the melissa went SCREAMING? haha. she begged to go to mc's as - might be there. and guess what? i dont know i wont reveal anymore or else i will be slaughtered by melissa. we went home, and in the interchange i saw alot of my primary school friends. they stared! new looks, new hair. heheh! took 16 and used the comp asap. of course NOTHING, im not expecting anything but i was hopping that maybe he changed his mind, and he would talk to me already. i miss him okay! i got some advice from my friends, they see me suffer they help me. and thx. she said dont run away from my problems, FACE THEM, but how if my problem doesnt want to face me?! i dont know. huursh.

How can I forget you when your always on my mind?
How can I not want you when your all I want inside?
How can I let you go when I can't see us apart?
How can I not love you when you control my heart?